After the Honeymoon is Over:
Taking your Romance Home
Honeymoons are amazingly romantic, but when you get back home to bills, work, cleaning, and a mountain of thank your cards to send out, it can be easy to forget that you were ever in paradise. Taking the romance of the honeymoon home is tough, but if you fight to keep that romance alive, your marriage will benefit. You will find it worthwhile to take that extra effort to keep the honeymoon spark in your marriage.
First, try celebrating your anniversary every year with a little honeymoon-esque vacation. You may not be able to afford a trip to Hawaii or the Bahamas every year, but you can plan something special that brings back the memories of your honeymoon. For example, if you spent your honeymoon in Greece, plan dinner at an authentic Greek restaurant. If possible, take a small vacation that is reminiscent of your honeymoon. Did you enjoy time on the Caribbean beaches on your honeymoon? Then take a weekend trip to a near-by beach or lake once a year to celebrate your anniversary.
You can also celebrate your anniversary by continuing to pursue an activity that you enjoyed with your new spouse while on your honeymoon. There were quite a few things you did on your honeymoon other than have sex. Which can you continue once you are home? Can you and your spouse take scuba-diving lessons from a local outfitter? Can you and your spouse try sailing at a local lake? Anything that will help you keep your honeymoon in mind is fair game.
As for romance, however, it takes more than copying activities to take the honeymoon home. Many couples report that they simply do not feel that same passion once they return home. Why? Life gets in the way. Here are a few tips you can use to keep that honeymoon romance alive in the bedroom and beyond:
- Plan at least one night a week so you and your spouse can be alone. That means no bringing work home from the office, no answering your mother’s phone calls or doing housework. Rent a movie that you can watch together, have dinner out, give one another massages, or plan another special activity to take off the stress. Even if all you do is talk about your day, spending this time together is a great way to make your relationship a bit more romantic. Sex shouldn’t be mandatory on your “date night,” but most couples will find that it comes naturally.
- Surprise your spouse with a gift for no reason. You don’t have to spend $50…or even $10. Next time you have to stop for gas on your way home from work, though, pick up your husband or wife’s favorite candy bar. Or, don’t spend any money at all – do something nice like scraping the ice from his or her car on a snowy morning or making breakfast in bed. These little things are what make a honeymoon romantic and special, but when we’re back to the real world, we often don’t remember to carry them over. Make it a goal to do something special for your spouse at least twice a week and your relationship will benefit.
- Set the mood. Hotel rooms for honeymooners are romantic because they have special features. You don’t need to put in a hot tub at home but take a moment to consider how you can make your bedroom more romantic. Can you add a few candles to the nightstand? Can you replace the jersey cotton sheets with sheets of a more sensual fabric? Can you play some mood music? All of these things can help create the romantic honeymoon setting no matter where you live.
Romance takes thought and planning, and a huge number of marriages fail simply spouses just expected it to happen. Romance won’t just happen without a little planning and thoughtfulness on your part.
And it doesn’t necessarily take a lot of time to plan that romance. The three tips above, combined, won’t take more than an hour every week, and that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Your spouse married you because he or she loves you. Now, it’s time to put that relationship to the test. Can you survive in the real world beyond marriage and your honeymoon? You can if you take a moment to bring that honeymoon romance into your everyday life.
Remember, the more romantic your marriage, the better your sex. Romance and lust go hand and hand, so if you’re hoping to improve or maintain your sex life, think about things you can do for your spouse to make your lives together more romantic. As you celebrate each new anniversary, go deeper into your love and friendship.